Family

Things have been pretty busy ever since I arrived here, and it’s been tough finding time to sit down, relax, and reflect. But now I have Malaria, so I don’t really have the energy to do anything else!

I’m going to tell you about the Chadian family that I live with here in Béré. I wish I could tell you that “I live with the _______ family”, but the naming system is much different in this culture. People don’t really have a first, last, or family name. They just have a bunch of names, and the order is unimportant. It seems that the name a person goes by is pretty much random. Also, they rarely know their age.

The dad is Desiré and the mom is Naomi. Desiré is a very social man. He is the principal of the Adventist high school and his dad is the chaplain at the hospital. Desiré seems to know and be related to everyone. He’s always out and about visiting family, friends, relatives, etc. He also speaks pretty decent English, which I consider a huge blessing.



Naomi is Desiré’s only wife (very rare) and he treats her with respect (also very rare). Despite the fact that he respects her by Chadian standards, it has been very eye-opening for me to see how females are treated in this culture. Chadian women/girls work SO hard, but receive very little recognition or respect. They basically hold the same value as cows, and are used to being ordered around by the men. It’s frustrating to watch.

Anway, there are also 3 children, I’m guessing ages 5ish, 3ish, and 1-2ish. The oldest boy is Barak, the middle boy is Michel, and the little girl is Esther. Naomi is the same age as me, and Desiré says that he is 24.



There are also lots of other children at our house all the time. There are two girls that live with us named Landin and Felicité. They are from a different village, but Desiré has agreed to provide them with a place to stay and also pay for their schooling.



The whole family treats me like a king, to the point that it’s a little awkward. I’m not used to having servants. Typically I eat meals with Desiré while the women and children sit at a distance on the ground and eat their meal. Usually the portions they give me are bigger than the portion for 5-7 women and children. I’m slowly trying to break the ice and befriend them, and it seems to be working. I can’t speak their language, but there is a universal language called love that breaks the status quo. All of the “FRAGILE - HANDLE WITH CARE” and “DO NOT TOUCH” stickers seem to be coming off my white skin.

If you look on the map of the hospital campus, find the semicircle of white-roofed buildings towards the bottom. To the left of that you should see a pathway running diagonally across a big field. Follow the path until it stops, and then extend it in the same direction and you’ll hit my family’s compound.



It’s probably 50x50 or so, and consists of a house for the family, a hut for me, a pit toilet, an enclosed area to take a bucket shower, another enclosed area to store the rice, a small room for cooking, and a well. The water from the well is only used for washing and bathing. We get our drinking water from the hospital compound, which has a very deep well. Our compound is unique in that there are lots of pretty trees and plants, including a banana tree. Desiré wants to plant a garden in the future with tomatoes, onions, garlic, etc.

My house is a little mud-brick hut, I’d guess about 8x10. I should clarify and say “our” house, because I share it with many others. Crickets, cockroaches, spiders, mosquitos, lizards, scorpions the occasional bat, and sometimes even the family chickens. It’s actually an exceptional hut by Chadian standards. It has a concrete slab for the floor, 3 windows, and even a door with a place to attach a lock. I’ve pitched my tent inside, which is HANDS DOWN the most useful thing I brought in my luggage. Thank you Mamma and Pappa for letting me borrow it!